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My best friend called and started crying inconsolably.

She is in a long distance relationship with this guy who lives abroad. They have known each other for almost a year now. They have exchanged pics, they talk on phone, gtalk, skype, sms and email of course. They have never seen each other; never met each other. She was introduced to him by her cousin sister’s husband. Online.

Thanks to the webcam- you at least get to see your loved ones online.

This guy is coming to India in November. Let’s call him B. My friend has lost out on some great proposals in the hope that B will show up someday and marry her. My friend is a bigger emotional fool than me. No wonder, we flock together!

B is a total mama’s boy. Nothing wrong with that, I respect guys who respect their parents. Who listen to their parents. Who care for their parents. But you can’t depend on your mama for every single decision. Every Goddamn thing! You have to take your own decisions sometimes. You have to be macho sometimes. Being mother-bonded BEYOND A POINT is a sign of insecurity and weakness.

Sure, shower your mother with all the love, respect and admiration. It’s cool. She deserves all that and much more. As a matter of fact, I want my brother to do the same thing, but in the process, don’t overlook or ignore your girl’s/wife’s needs, wants and desires. Take some independent decisions for God’s sake. You’re a man! Act like one!

B also appears to be SHALLOW. He recently saw some pics of my friend and he was sort of turned off. Reason: Her rebonded hair now looks frizzy, unruly and unkempt. Of course man! After 8 to 10 months of rebonding, your hair will not look the same as on day one. Moreover, he thinks she has put on some weight. How shallow can someone be? How superficial can you be? He specifically called her to tell her she has changed a lot physically- that she has grown fat and her hair doesn’t look all that great now. He said, “Do you really look like that in real life?” I wish I could slap him on behalf of my friend.

Do husbands leave their wives if they put on weight? When they become pregnant? If their rebonding starts to fade, if they become ugly, if they start balding, if they grow old? I think a woman looks most beautiful when she’s pregnant!

Me and my friend are not photogenic. We look prettier in real life. And I am super confident that if B meets my friend in November, he’ll go bonkers over her. He’ll fall head over heels for her. But B does not deserve her. Reason: He is commitment phobic, plus, he is more concerned about her external beauty than her inner beauty. I also get the feeling that he is two-timing her, and is just looking for reasons to dump her.

Why do such guys forget that there’s more to a woman than her looks and body!!! Why do we forget that with strengths come weaknesses!!! With assets come flaws!!! With normalities come quirks!!!

I don’t want my friend to meet B. He is an asshole of the first order. She has cried buckets already. She said she’s lost all her confidence. Personal remarks are never welcome. Please don’t ever tell a woman she is fat. It’s the worst relationship mistake. It’s a blunder. Even if she asks you to be honest, lie to her. Don’t ever tell her she is fat. The fact is, we can’t take it.

And NEVER play with a woman’s emotions!!

Oh, and also a man’s emotions. (I have already acquired the reputation of being judgmental: P)

As Baz Luhrmann says, “Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.”

Summer 2007 is a hard hitting Bollywood film that highlights the issue of farmer suicides. I fail to understand why socially relevant films (read Summer 2007, Swades, Satta, Phir Milenge, Lakshya) bomb at the box office. (Thank God we at least appreciated Taare Zameen Par and My Brother Nikhil).

Are socially relevant films not marketed well or is the subject too bland for an audience so used to being fed on a staple diet of hardcore naach-gaana, slap stick humour, mindless comedies, sex comedies and crude humour? Why is the Indian audience so averse to socially relevant themes? Do we ever want to mature? Anyway, I don’t want to veer off course.

Summer 2007 is a brilliant film. Very very thought provoking! It released last year, but unfortunately it did not receive the due credit it truly deserved. I’m sure half the people are not even aware of a film like that.

Coming to the core issue now: Nearly every single day, we hear of farmer suicides in India. Farmers are still dying in India. In Andhra Pradesh. In Kerala. In Maharashtra.

Vidarbha (Maharashtra) is especially reeling under drought. The suicide rate is significantly high in Vidarbha. The agrarian crisis has drastically aggravated in Vidarbha. The Yavatmal district continues to remain a grim statistic. Farmers continue to suicide in Vidarbha.

In 2006, 1,044 suicides were reported in Vidarbha alone – that’s one suicide every eight hours- Wikipedia.

Most of these farmers are heavily indebted. Debt-ridden farmers suicide- plunging their families deeper into debt, depression and poverty.

The crux of the problem: Mounting debts, exorbitant interest rates, crop failure, corruption, poor rainfall, private money lenders, extreme poverty, WTO’s policies, etc.

Vidarbha is primarily a cotton belt. There are maximum cotton producing farmers in Vidarbha. So, do we need more projects to profit cotton farmers? Can they not grow other crops?

The plight of the Indian farmer is tragic, depressing and shocking. One more Indian farmer will gulp down a bottle of pesticide and his wife will be left waiting for compensation.

Whatever the reasons are, it’s a wake up call for us Indians! For the Indian economy! For the Indian agricultural sector!

Source: SMS

Neil Armstrong lands on the moon and sees two men. He asks them who they are.

Reply: Cameraman ke saath Deepak Chaurasia AAJ TAK!

The first thing that draws a man towards a woman is how physically attractive the woman is. At least in the beginning! (Read full lips, full breasts, a sexy cleavage, protruding/rounded buttocks, long legs, etc). The sex appeal a woman oozes scores over all her other attributes- Things like intelligence, sense of humour, background, etc are all long-term parameters . I believe these attributes don’t matter in a short-term relationship. An understanding, caring compassionate woman is definitely not a short-term catch; neither is a woman who is a ‘good conversationalist’…

PS: I know women are no different. Most women only care about MONEY. Women are also physically attracted to men; but there are some women who desire security, respect, love, trust and loyalty in relationships.

Source: Internet

1) True lovers don’t say they love each other, they know they do

2) A priceless moment is when the person you have fallen in love with, looks you in the eye to tell you he has fallen in love with you

3) True Love is loving that someone with their worst flaws

4) When we love, it isn’t because the person’s perfect, it’s because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly

5) You know you truly love somebody when they hurt you so badly, but all you can think about it is the times when they made you smile

6) You truly love someone when you can feel every joy, sadness and pain of the other as if they were your own

7) No matter how big the world is, if we are meant to be together, love will lead us to be together
Love is a constant battle between the heart and the mind; True Love is when they agree

9) Never leave the one you LOVE for the one you LIKE because the one you LIKE will one day LEAVE you for the one they LOVE!

10) All temptations cease to exist, when a man is really in love

11) A man in love will do whatever it takes to be with the woman he loves

12) A man in love is never too busy to sms, call, email or meet the woman he loves; he’ll do it anyhow.

13) If you love me, let me know, If you don’t, let me go

Source: SMS

1) Money can’t buy happiness, but somehow it’s more comfortable to cry in a BMW than a cycle

2) Forgive your enemy, but remember the bastard’s face

3) Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again

4) Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them

5) Alcohol doesn’t solve any problem, but then, neither does milk

Retail therapy works.

I love my sister and my girl-friends.

I am not tech savvy.

My road sense is not as bad as I think.

I got myself a metal sports watch a couple of months ago. I can’t believe I’ve fallen in love with it. This is because I’m obsessed with everything delicate, sleek, elegant and feminine.

I can’t believe I’m switching to my brother’s old handset- N82. It’s my personal opinion that it is too bulky and manly for someone like me. Refer to the reason above.

I can’t believe I’m switching to Vodafone. Actually I can’t believe I am changing my cell number. I was confident I would NEVER change my cell number.

I can’t believe I called for Green Tea instead of Frappe at CCD.

I can’t wait to go to Goa on the 30th.

I haven’t had bournvita in a while.

My rebonding is fading already.

I can’t believe I haven’t abused in a while. Even online.

Shahrukh Khan has disappointed me. He was detained at the Newark Airport. I’m convinced it was a publicity stunt for ‘My Name is Khan’.

Blogger Stray shared this wonderful video with me. Totally awe-inspiring! I need to learn a great deal from it…

It says:

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they’ve faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blind sides you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself
either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

Sometimes I feel like disconnecting myself from EVERYTHING. I feel like settling down in an almost-inaccessible gaon, far from the madding crowd. Where I am not answerable to ANYONE. I want to totally retreat. I want to totally withdraw.

I really feel like having a soulful one-on-one conversation with God. I want to know so much. There are so many questions unanswered in my mind. I feel so anxious and restless these days, I can’t even sleep peacefully. I keep tossing and turning all night.

It irritates me that I can’t see without my contact lenses or glasses. My eyesight is deteriorating, and I have a persistent headache these days. I know I should limit the time I spend in front of the computer. But I’m just crazy.

I regularly go to the gym, but I still feel totally drained out after my workout. Just about a year ago, I used to feel so charged up all through my workout (1 hr: 30 minutes), and even after my workout. Gym meant rejuvenation and relaxation then. I used to die to workout. And now, I get totally washed out in flat 45 minutes. I am forever panting for breath, and I drink water like there’s no tomorrow. I fail to understand this loss of energy and stamina. And I feel like the treadmill is screwing up my knees. Big Time!

I have become too moody and cranky as a person. I experience terrible mood swings these days. And I don’t attribute it to just PMS. I don’t want to hurt people I don’t want to hurt.

I misbehave with those I should behave myself with, and I behave with those I should misbehave with.

It is not a very good thing to be a good listener. To be a sweet person. To be compassionate. To be expressive. To be transparent. I get tired of listening to everybody’s problems. Somebody’s boyfriend has dumped her, somebody is not getting married, somebody is having a tough time with her in-laws, somebody is unhappy with the way she looks…as if my own issues are not enough to drain me out.

And I must add… being beautiful is a problem. Really. Okay…there are privileges of being beautiful, but there are more problems. And being a beautiful person is a bigger problem.

I felt so strongly about socially relevant issues like rape, dowry, women exploitation, politics, the Indian education system, terrorism, etc. Sadly, I don’t remember the last time I picked one and discussed it here on my blog. Even my blog posts have started to stink.

People have a tendency to judge you on the basis of what you write. They are quick to jump to conclusions. They form a mental picture of you. They assume and presume things about you. My blog is definitely a reflection of ‘me’, but there’s more to me than my blog! I don’t like to be judged.

I want to SWITCH OFF my noisy mind! It is totally screwed up! Even garbage smells better!

I swear my thoughts are spinning out of control. I caught myself staring at the ceiling last night.

I want to SCREAM my lungs out!

I want to DISAPPEAR!

I am totally DRAINED OUT!

PS: I have deactivated ‘comments’ for obvious reasons.

Please avoid emailing, SMSing or calling me. I felt like expressing myself, so I blogged my heart out. Thanks.